Thursday, August 3, 2017

*Feeling Behind*

I think I am gonna start blogging more. I just have random thoughts in my head that I need to release. I am in a place in my life were I feel like I need to grow. Right now I feel so behind, and not behind like I am comparing lives. It's more of things I thought about and said I want to do and nothing else happened. I feel so overwhelmed and scattered brain just thinking about it. I know I need to be more focused and get my shit together. What is really holding me back? Time doesn't wait for no one. Why am I still here? Who am I? And what legacy do I plan to leave for myself? I asked myself a million questions all the time. What is really holding me back? I can only hold myself back. Fear is only false evidence appearing real.

I need to get my finances in order...I am almost there 4 loans left

I need to get my health in check. Schedule all my appointments and exercise daily. Eat clean healthy foods for energy and vitality.

I need to keep my mental health together by writing, saying no when needed, not over whelming myself, and staying away from negative people.

I need to fight for my dreams. They are nothing to play with. I have to be serious and honest with myself. I need clarity to find out who I really am.

I need to heal from the past. Past tramas with sexual abuse, physical abuse, and emotional abuse.

I need to rebuild my confidence and self esteem on a daily basics.

I need to speak and say hello and give compliments to others.

I need to enjoy my feminine energy.

I need to love more and hate less.

I need to understand everything happens for a reason.

I need to be REAL with myself (Mask Off). Enjoy myself to the fullest. I need to realize I have one life to live.

I need to open up for life.

I need to watch old movies and laugh.

I need to be more adventurous.

I need more challenging friends.

I know I opened up a lot here. I just have to be more real and be myself in this fake world. I have gone through some challenging stages of my life. I dont want anything holding me back or causing me fear. I want to live freely and know why God put me here on this earth. I guestion a lot of thing and sometimes I dont need to. It makes the process even harder. I can over think something and get pushed back in my goals. So this post is more of a reminder for my mself to stay on course until complete. This was a whole lot to get of my chest, it's one of those day where I can't stop thinking. Everything has to come all out. Just understand your thoughts and words have power. Speak postive vibrations to your desires, and I will do the same. The universe is listeningšŸŒŽ! I might be behind but watch me catch up.

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